Life changed for me 20 months ago

20 months ago, my life changed in the most incredible of ways. I became a mom to the most incredible little boy. Of course you expect me to say that-I gave birth to the kid-but he really is a remarkable person.

I was looking back on how it all happened...and maybe if you're pregnant for the first time you shouldn't read this...I don't want to scare anyone away :/ The fact is, my birth story was a little...extreme? I know there are some worse ones, but I've heard plenty of easy peasy birth stories too, so just know every person is different. And even after all that I went through-going all the way to 41 weeks, being 190 pounds (I see your eyes bulge out of your head! I can laugh about it now, so don't feel bad), going through a 40 something hour labor unmedicated, ending up with a c-section...my arch enemy at the time, having heart issues in the hospital, struggling to bond with Denzel, etc. etc....do you know that I would do it all again? Is that insane or what?! I would do it all over again.

STOP. I'm not pregnant. So don't ask me, because I will assume you think my belly looks pregnant, and I might just slug you. No baby in there, just the aftermath of my son. Yes, it looks like world war III on my body, but meh, whatevs. He was worth it.

In these 20 months, Denzel has taught me that I have FAR more patience than I ever gave myself credit for. He taught me priorities in life, something that I continue to keep sacred at all costs. And he taught me that the relationship between a parent and their child is one of the deepest, most intimate things you can experience here on Earth. When I look at him, I see God's love for me in the purest form. I know it sort of sounds selfish, but truth be told, he has taught me way more than I can take credit for in teaching him. And he keeps growing. Keeps learning. Keeps loving.

Denzel is one of the most loving children I've met. He regularly asks for hugs and kisses, lays his head on his daddy's shoulder any chance he gets, and shows incredible empathy for people when they get hurt or are upset in some way. He is more than I could have dreamed of. Of course he has tantrums (although they're not that big a deal), and he gets sick, which requires sleepless nights and super cranky parents, he even doesn't listen from time to time...he's human. But his spirit is remarkable, and continues to flourish and develop into the man that God designed him to be. Even before I had thought about having children (that was most of my life, ha ha ha!) God had a plan and a purpose for this beautiful boy. What an honor it is to see that plan unfold before my very eyes.

I love you baby. You have made me a better person, a more caring individual, and have restored my faith in human kind. I love you.